Ch-Ch-Changes For The Amazing Spider-Matt and Blog

I've spent the last two months marathoning the last two seasons of Supernatural actively planning the future of my blog. I want my readers to be able to come here and feel welcome. I want my readers to feel like there can be a community of geeks (of all varieties) here. I hope to also get blog posts out with more consistency.

Enter the wife with OCD and a knack (and obsession) with scheduling.

The calendar is planned, and the future of The Amazing Spider-Matt is written (or typed to be more accurate). Here are some things to look forward to in the coming month for this site:

Retro Game Recap

Thank to the guys down at Gamers Anonymous, I am now the proud owner of an Two-in-One NES/SNES system and a growing stack of retro games from the days of yore (ie: 80's and 90's). Each Tuesday I'll be bringing you up to speed on the great games of the past that still exist in our hearts and eBay.

Comic Book Corner

Would you believe I've actually been requested by readers to talk about comics? Well it's true. There's a little True Believer in all of us and every Thursday I'll be sharing my favorite issues that week, in addition to helping the growing generation of comic book geeks learn their history.

Monthly Marathons

A few years ago I forced my wife to sit down and watch the Aliens movies all in one day. Since then we've made a tradition out of marathons, including the Saw movies and Paranormal Activity for Halloween, and Star Wars this past May the Fourth be With You. Because we got such a good response from people after our Star Wars celebration, we've decided to make this a monthly event. The first weekend of each month we'll be pulling out the great movie collections and live tweeting as we watch them.

Most of the movies will correspond with the theatrical release of the next in the collection, and we'll be letting everyone know ahead of time so you can all join in on the fun! To end July with a bang, today we'll be breaking out the Three Flavours Trilogy (also called the Blood and Ice Cream trilogy or the Cornetto trilogy). A series of films directed by Edgar Wright and starring Simon Pegg and Nick Frost, consisting of Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz and to be released August 23rd in theaters, The World's End.

So tomorrow make sure you're following @AmzngSpiderMatt and @UntypicallyJia and use the hashtag #ThreeFlavours as we make our way through the first two installments of the trilogy (as well as Paul, for good measure).

Then get ready for next weekend (August 3-4) because we're digging into the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles collection!

TV and Games and Life - Oh My!

I'll still be reviewing movies and games, and there's a list of catching up to do. Also, when The Walking Dead returns in October, you can bet I'll be there to recap and review my way through the herd of episodes.

In addition to all things geek and media, I really want to get more personally focused and talk a little bit more about me, after all, this is my blog. Since attending my first comic convention, I've really begun to examine my entire belief system as well as who I am as a person. It brings up how I was raised, how I've viewed others as a whole, how I have changed and how I would like to continue to change to ultimately not be so closed minded. In the end all it really took was introducing myself to one lone Gallifreyan, (a mad man with a box), to show me what acceptance could truly be like.

So when all else fails I guess I'll be asking, "What Would The Doctor Do?"

I look forward to the next few months, and with a massive amount of movie watching, comic reading and game playing on my schedule, I'll do my best to make blogging a priority. If there's anything you want to know, want me to review or recap for you, or if you just want to hang out on X-Box Live and shoot Locusts, my email is always open.

Remember Everything

I think every blogger out there - if they blog their reality - thinks at some point, "What if 'so-and-so' reads this? What would they say? I'm speaking my thoughts and feelings and my truth, but would they see it as hate or hurtful?" For me those people are my parents.

I bought a Five Finger Death Punch album recently "American Capitalist" and it had this song "Remember Everything" that said a lot of how I've felt so I thought I'd run those lyrics here.

Dear mother, I love you

I'm sorry, I wasn't good enough

Dear Father, forgive me

Cause in your eyes, I just never added up

In my heart I know I failed you, but you left me here alone

If I could hold back the rain, would you numb the pain?

Cause I remember everything.

If I could help you forget, would you take my regrets?

Cause I remember everything.

But dear brother, just don't hate me

For never standing by you, or being by your side

Dear sister, please don't blame me

I only did, what I thought was truly right

It's a long and lonely road, when you know you walk alone

If I could hold back the rain, would you numb the pain?

Cause I remember everything.

If I could help you forget, would you take my regrets?

Cause I remember everything.

I feel like running away

I'm still so far from home

You say I'll never change but what the fuck do you know?

I'll burn it all to the ground, before I let you run

Please forgive me, I can't forgive you now.

If I could hold back the rain, would you numb the pain?

Cause I remember everything.

If I could help you forget, would you take my regrets?

Cause I remember everything.

It all went by so fast; I still can't change the past

I always will remember, everything

If we could start again, would that change the end?

We remember everything.

Songwriter(s): Thomas Jason Grinstead, Zoltan Bathroy, Jeremy Spencer, Ivan Moody 
Copyright: Five Finger Death Punch, Sony/Atv Tunes Llc, Ffdp Music, Sony/Atv Songs Llc

14 Already? Only Feels Like 9

When I woke up today I had several ideas on what to put on my blog today so I thought I'd run it past my wife. Here are the events that occurred:

Me: Hey babe, today is the 13th and I want to make sure that I get a third blog post up today so I can still be part of May Blogging Challenge.

Jia: Well I can post my review of the latest Game of Thrones. . . or you can post. . . something.

Me: Well I don't want you to watch Thrones without me.

Jia: Oh, well then you can post . . . today.

Me: I do have a game review or something I can do?

Jia: What's today, Matt?

Me: Monday.

Jia: What happened a long time ago today?

Me: . . . Oh, when we went out yesterday you said its like the 14th Anniversary of when we first started dating.

Jia: Yep that's today. I posted on my blog about it.

Happy Anniversary!

I wouldn't exactly call us "star crossed" as the only hurdle was that I had to break her up with her boyfriend before I could marry her.

 I love you baby! Here's to 14 more!

My Shame

I apologize in advance for any offensive language used herein. 

I feel that if I shy away or hide words, it would falsify my truth.

---

I tend to be someone who stays away from controversy. The "it gets better" videos, Prop 8, voting (as long as popular vote means nothing and our president is elected by electoral colleges, I refuse) but recently, within the last year I feel that my walls have been breaking down. Before I get into who I am now, I feel I owe you a bit of history on who the Amazing Spider-Matt is. I apologize in advance if this gets long windy.

I was born in 1984, to Mormon parents - strict Mormon parents. We never had caffeinated drinks in the house. I had my first Dr. Pepper at a sleepover at a friends house when I was 13. I wasn't allowed to watch PG-13 rated movies until I turned 13, and I was banned from R rated films altogether, (I did sneak and see The Ghost and the Darkness - the murder mystery where the lion did it - when I was 12, double trouble.) I wasn't allowed to date until I was 16, so I had to keep all my relationships secret and hidden, resorting to having friends act as lookouts and having girls meet me at male friend's houses. All this subterfuge doesn't really make me sound like a good guy, in fact I was kind of a shit.

The restrictions I had just made me want my freedom all the more. By fifteen years old I had seen over 100 rated R films, smoked pot, and had lost my virginity. I was fucking awesome. I wouldn't trade my life for anyone's (except maybe Katy Morgan's,) but I had been emotionally and mentally stunted by my upbringing and it wasn't until this last year that I knew what a monster I had become.

Last year, June to be exact, I went to my very first comic book convention. ACE (Albuquerque Comic Expo) 2012, and was stunned into realizing - for the first time - who I am. I've always been a gamer, I've always collected comics, but like the song "Going Home" by my favorite band Kirby Krackle, I felt like I was home.

I was in a place fully accepting of me and was 100% behind everything I loved.

I met some minor celebrities, Kevin Sorbo (dick btw) and some major ones like Jason Mewes, Stan Lee, and Kevin Smith. As well as a great voice actor, Tom Kane (Mr. Harriman from Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, Yoda from the Clone Wars cartoons, and Professor Plutonium from Powerpuff Girls.)

What I immediately knew was that not only was I accepted for what and who I am but oddly enough was accepting of everyone else around me.

I'm sure for most people this sounds like nothing, but for me this was astronomical.

In a form of confession, I was raised to hate gays. I have no excuse. I felt this was normal. I didn't talk about it really, so I didn't associate myself with hate groups. But my hate for everything and everyone who was different was complete.

Recently I found myself crying at stories of people finding themselves, discovering who they were, mostly in comics. A gay marriage in the pages of recent X-Men issues. In one of the new issues of FF, someone found that with their new freedoms they are not male - as previously thought - but female, and they were accepted at face value by their brothers. These come first to mind among true acceptance.

Sexuality was not the only area in which I find my previous actions and thoughts archaic. Years ago I recall telling friends and family that I "liked" racism as long as it was "funny," but I would say the word "nigger" without a second thought, and with malice. These things actually keep me up at night now.

Unfortunately for me, these issues varied and were such a long time ago. Now I don't know who to apologize to - or for that matter - how to begin to apologize. That's why this is here. This blog, though not often viewed, will have to do for now. I'm sorry.

I was asked recently how or why I changed, and honestly it really does come from an epiphany of being accepted. I no longer think in terms of "black and white", which is something I feel I learned from Mormonism. the "if it's not my view, then it is incorrect, evil, and to be cast aside" mentality. I know I put quotes there, but I'm not quoting anything specific it's just the feeling you get behind the teachings. Racism and hate is never okay, and while it wasn't taught in church or at home, it was (for me) an extension of how I felt I'd been taught. Due to this, I no longer attend church despite having a love for those who do - my loving parents included.

Again, to those I hurt directly or indirectly, I apologize. I hope that if this has helped anyone, you choose to let me know.

Thank you for your time and I promise a much less serious post soon.

-ASM out